OPTICS 01 · LIVE FEED · TARGET DESIGNATED
JOTCHUA3000
Military-grade chassis. Squeaky-toy operating system.
Titanium paws. Quantum navigation. Threat detection across twelve dimensions. Every one of them pointed at the same six-dollar duck.
XDrag any file onto this page. The unit will classify it.
SPEC 01 · SYSTEMS
The unit
Everything the engineers built, and what each part is currently doing.
- 01 Titanium skeleton 4% DUCK
- 02 Quantum navigation 2% DUCK
- 03 Threat detection, 12 dimensions 8% DUCK
- 04 Thermal optics 100% DUCK
- 05 Acoustic array 61% SQUEAK
- 06 Gait stabiliser 3% NOT MOVING
Dimensions available: twelve. Dimensions in use: one.
RECORD 02 · FINAL DEMONSTRATION
The demonstration
Recovered from the room audio. The unit's column was filled in by the unit.
“Scan the laboratory.”
Scanned. 1,412 objects catalogued in 0.4 seconds.
“Now identify the highest-priority target.”
Identified.
“…that is a six-dollar squeaky duck.”
Confirmed. Six dollars.
“The duck is harmless.”
Logged as an opinion.
“Please stand down.”
Placed one titanium paw on the duck. Refused to reconsider.
The project was declared successful.
No one has been able to explain this to the funding committee.
PROCEDURE 03 · INTERACTIVE
Retasking attempt
The lock is not a setting — it is a route. Cut the cables between the power cell and the duck lock. The processor will reroute around anything you sever, so keep cutting until nothing gets through.
HARNESS NOMINAL. 16 CABLES INTACT.
Successful isolations: 0 · Duck still priority target: YES
SPEC 04 · LOADOUT
What it is carrying
Four slots. Nothing hidden in any of them.
- SLOT 01 Total supply 1,000,000,000 FIXED
- SLOT 02 Buy / sell tax 0 / 0 NONE
- SLOT 03 Liquidity BURNED LOCKED
- SLOT 04 Mint authority REVOKED DARK
One duck. No levers.
PROCEDURE 05 · FOUR PHASES
Acquisition sequence
The same four phases the unit runs on anything it intends to keep.
-
01
Acquire
Install Phantom or Solflare. That is your chassis — nothing works without one.
-
02
Range
Fund it with SOL. Anything between a coffee and a defence budget is a valid range.
-
03
Confirm
Swap SOL for $JOT3K on pump.fun or Jupiter. Paste the contract above, confirm, done.
-
04
Hold
Put one paw on it. Do not reconsider. This phase has no end condition.
RECORD 06 · STANDING ORDERS
Standing orders
Issued once. Never rescinded.
-
ORDER 01
Maintain contact
Launch, chart, first holders. Through all of it the paw does not move.
ACTIVE -
ORDER 02
Expand perimeter
Trackers, listings, and an X account operated by something with titanium paws.
ACTIVE -
ORDER 03
Additional ducks
The community designates new targets. Each one receives a paw and a serial number.
QUEUED -
ORDER 04
Permanent protection
No end date on this one. That was always the point of the programme.
QUEUED
TRANSMISSION ENDS
The duck remains under
military protection.
Six dollars of rubber, guarded by the most expensive dog ever manufactured. Join the perimeter.